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Showing posts with label funny. Show all posts
Showing posts with label funny. Show all posts

Monday, June 14, 2010

BOB & THE BLONDE





BOB & THE BLONDE
Bob, a handsome dude, walked into a
sports bar around 9:58 pm.
He sat down next to a blonde at the
bar and stared up at the TV.
The 10 pm news was coming on.
The news crew was covering the story
of a man on the ledge of a large building
preparing to jump.
The blonde looked at Bob and said,
“Do you think he’ll jump?”
Bob said, “You know, I bet he’ll jump.”
The blonde replied, “Well, I bet he won’t.”
Bob placed a $20 bill on the bar and
said, “You’re on!”
Just as the blonde placed her money
on the bar, the guy on the ledge did
a swan dive off the building, falling
to his death.
The blonde was very upset, but willingly
handed her $20 to Bob, saying,
“Fair’s fair.  Here’s your money.”
Bob replied, “I can’t take your money.
I saw this earlier on the 5 pm news,
and so I knew he would jump.”
The blonde replied, “I did too, but
didn’t think he’d do it again.”
Bob took the money…

Bob and Blonde1
Bob, a handsome dude, walked into a
sports bar around 9:58 pm.
He sat down next to a blonde at the
bar and stared up at the TV for World Cup 2010 Highlights.
The 10 pm news was coming on.
The news crew was covering the story
of a man on the ledge of a large building
preparing to jump.
Jumping bob and blonde
The blonde looked at Bob and said,
“Do you think he’ll jump?”
Bob said, “You know, I bet he’ll jump.”
The blonde replied, “Well, I bet he won’t.”
Bob and Blonde joke
Bob placed a $20 bill on the bar and
said, “You’re on!”
Just as the blonde placed her money
on the bar, the guy on the ledge did
a swan dive off the building, falling
to his death.
The blonde was very upset, but willingly
handed her $20 to Bob, saying,
“Fair’s fair.  Here’s your money.”
Bob replied, “I can’t take your money.
I saw this earlier on the 5 pm news,
and so I knew he would jump.”
The blonde replied, “I did too, but
didn’t think he’d do it again.”
bob and blonde joke 2
Bob took the money…
bob and blonde joke
Poor Baby (Blonde)

We are in trouble – For our US Friends

We are in trouble…

The population of the Inited States is approx. 310 million.

160 million are retired.

That leaves 140 million to do the work.

There are 85 million in school.

Which leaves 55 million to do the work.

Of this there are 35 million employed by the federal government.

Leaving 15 million to do the work.

2.8 million are in the armed forces preoccupied with killing Osama

Bin-Laden.

Which leaves 12.2 million to do the work.

Take from that total the 10.8 million people who work for state and city

Governments. And that leaves 1.4 million to do the work.

At any given time there are 188,000 people in hospitals.

Leaving 1,212,000 to do the work.

Now, there are 1,211,998 people in prisons

That leaves just two people to do the work

You and me.

And there you are,

Sitting on your ass,

At your computer, reading jokes.

jay-and-silent-bob-us in trouble

Nice. Real nice.